the rains

It's been raining tropical thunderstorms every evening.My favourite time when the air is fresh and free of haze except for the infamous traffic crawl and flooding.Couldn't life be just simple with my plants growing well in the wet weather and me curled up viewing indie movies and reading "The girl who kicked the hornet's nest."I've  just finished reading "radio Shangri La" and an autobiography of a Tibetan activist.A slow life at snail pace that's all I ask and I would love to retreat to the rural countryside of Kalumpang or Frasers where I can garden to my heart's delight and write a novella.A simple ,quiet life far from the maddening crowd.
Bliss.


I've just viewed two director's indie movie that  has been enriched by cross cultural adaptations of cinematography and style of narration."The Lunchbox" an indie movie by Ritesh batra starring Irrfan Khan  and Nirmat Kaur was a rom comedy with a streak of realim of people living lives of quiet desperation-women trapped in loneliness of loveless marriages or elderly women fulfilling their marital duties after that spark of love has vanished .I like the particularly  local context of the dabawalla system ,the way Indian life revolves around the paneer and roti and that love is  expressed not so much in words as in deeds.The heart wrenching scene is very eloquently still and quiet when the main character Saajan looks longingly at the warm scene of a family with children and parents enjoying a scrumptious dinner.Unlike Bollywood movies that go for a song and a dance too long and the archetypal gangster and in law,this movie is realistically directed.Despite the difference in culture ,the emotions and scenario are universal themes.It reminded one of the miscommunication in the Hollywood movies of You've got mail or Sleepless in Seattle.I'm so looking forward to his next movie 'The sense of an Ending" which I've just read.

The other movie by a Taiwanese director called the Assassin was so different from the usual flying swordsfighter martial genre.Again I 'm impressed by the Western style of cinematography of black and white versus the stunning landscape .The emotion is muted and understated instead of the usual melodramatic plot,the sense of betrayal and conflicted emotions between love and duty resonates throughout.It reminds me of Terence Mallick "The tree" in terms of using the setting to showcase what is not openly expressed between the characters.

The only thing is that there are so few who can appreciate the subtle indie movies so that I could view our local indie movies by Hu yao Gang and the other on Moving house in which the practice of transporting the whole house by gotong royong is seen.Our locals win accolades abroad but is not recognised by mainstream audience cause they don't play by the rules of blockbusters.

That which all students dread-Exams

Exams aren't all that bad-it's not the be all end all of life.Now Life- that's another story that will test you again and again at the most unexpected time and place.Well, at least one good thing about exams is it's all up to you-to prepare for it or not but in  life there are some things or events which are out of your hands.

You think the HSC was hard? Try being an adult!

Date

November 3, 2015 - 9:00PM

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Alan Stokes

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Now you're on your own, we've jotted down a few handy hints to get you through life.

The strain of sitting your HSC is nothing compared to some of the things life will throw at you. Photo: Wolter Peeters

Well now, our little girl with the fishing spear in your head, that's it then. Fourteen years after we almost lost you, your Higher School Certificate is done.

Enjoy the break while you can. Because there's one little thing we forgot to mention as we mollycoddled you through, paid $200 to fix your cracked iPhone screen, made you breakfast in bed, picked up your wet towels, drove you to and from school, tried to make you be bothered, helped draw up study timetables which you ignored, dropped you at parties, bought you formal dresses and shoes, transferred cash for your takeaways while we slaved at home making you dinner, ironed those rotten pleated skirts and picked up your dirty make-up wipes. And did we charge you for the free psychological counselling sessions? No. Not that you ever listened to us.

But here's that one little thing we didn't mention.

If you think the HSC was hard: try adulthood.

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Just in case you find that daunting, we've jotted down a few handy hints:

Forgive early and forgive often. Everyone makes a mistake or two hundred. Think about the teenager who's walking along with his five-pronged fishing spear, unsheathed, through the crowd of kids next to the swimming pool at Palm Beach. So the spear pierces your skull. You are three years old. You are going to die. They fly you to hospital. In our minds we make funeral plans. Then ... voila! The X-ray shows the prongs missed your brain by 3 millimetres. You have to make allowances for stupid actions like that teenager's. We chose not to pursue charges against him. We hope you are old enough now to understand why. If there's a pattern of stupid behaviour, of course, all bets are off. Don't take crap from nasty people who refuse to admit or learn from their mistakes.

If someone hits you, they don't like you. And guess what? They certainly don't love you. No excuses. No second chances. No "I have to stay for the sake of the kids". Find help and walk away. Watch out for the danger signs among your friends, too.

Judge others as you would want to be judged. Imagine being blindfolded. Feel the face of the person opposite you. Ask them questions about their life and what they feel. Notice the similarities? Now name the person's skin colour. Nuff said. 

Children are why we're here. If not your children, then nieces and nephews, foster kids, adoption, school students or youngsters overseas desperate for a fair go.

Money does not matter to us. But it matters to people who don't have any. So be generous whenever you can. And that means being happy to pay tax if it means better services for those who need them.

Never think that just because you can do something everyone else should be able to as well. We're born with different skill sets and come from different backgrounds. Respect the differences.

Boredom expands to fill the space. Spend your time learning or helping others instead.

The world has a million places to see and a million people to meet. Don't die without seeing and meeting most of them.

Career choices aren't made at 18 or 21 or even 30. Have a go at as many jobs as you can – and that includes the dirtiest, smelliest ones. The odour of grease trap and septic tank will remind you that we're all the same beneath the veneer of self-importance.  

You have a talent and a passion. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to discover yours.

And above all ...

Start listening to your parents for a change. Especially the next bit: Please come home whenever you can, for as long as you can, because it's where you belong and we'll always need you here.

Such is life ...

astokes@fairfaxmedia.com.au

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