Wet Sunday

today zumba at peace park cancelled due to a public event n heavy rain.i waited until rain stopped and went taman jaya for zumba workout.feel sooo good. spent Sunday with my German excolleague whom i havent seen for 6 years.We had fun exploring Chinatown,eating at Old China cafe,watching a digital art of batik in Rex KL,played drums at drum circle at KL kreatif arts festival,watched a Cantonese opera show and visited Chan clan temple.She loved the drumming experience and my palms were red after drumming so hard to favourites like Chan Mali Chan and burung kakak tua.She saw a different side of Chinatown besides food n shopping. should make it an annual event for tourists.

Doing Dana

gonna do lunch dana to present to the bhante doing the spiritual retreat at Utama Bodhi Vihara to get merit to transfer to departed Myanmar young man who leapt to his death.ive been having sleepless nites and restless time since i witnessed his twisted body.This is PTSD.i saw the middle aged lady who collapsed and died of heart attack at the condo car park last year and in Pelangi Damansara,i saw the gory sight of the pregnant mother who committed suicide by jumping down from the balcony,her blood splattered all over the white Honda car parked below.I think death by non peaceful means is so traumatic for an average person so i need to transfer merit to these souls to send them on their last journey. Im down with fever n flu after a year. free from sickness due to the low spirits haunting my sleep.Idam me natinam hotu ,sukhita hontu natayo.i feel in my heart very uneasy so i pray i havent offended the two deceased males as i feel eerie walking past the spot where they passed away.Jun reported feeling sick and feverish this evening and even my darling pussy is sick and vomitted everywhere and lost his appetite for wet tuna.he is listless n just sleeps.tomorrow one has to see a doc for medicine and the cat visit the vet for his vomitting bout.sigh please let me sleep well tonite.

Hot meals on rainy days

Its been raining non stop.Its so cold that i had to switch off the air con in the car when im driving in the rain as my toes are numb.So good to boil herbal chicken soup with Matsutake and morechella mushroom and dried cordycep flowers n red dates.i cooked chicken rice with shitake mushrooms,pumpkin cubes and chinese sausages.its hearty meal on cold nites.no cold salad anymore.lunch is shepherds pie with mashed potatoes,minced chicken,green peas in tomato puree.yum

When sleep don't come

Sleepless.cold rainy nite.My painting of dreamscapes.night perfect cover up imperfections,the cat is cursing,im scared of lightning and thunder.let me in.i need comfort.the shadows lurking in my mind vanishes.soft,purring bliss

Mingalaba

Mingalaba or May you be blessed They say its a blessing to be born into this human realm. So do I consider myself having a blessed life.My father worked hard planting rice,vegetables and rearing chickens and ducks on our small farm.I dont remember him much as when I was seven years old,he went to the forest to clear the bushes,stepped on a landmine that took his life. My mother Aye worked on his farm to support me and my elder sister. I followed She plowed the soil with the spade,raked it and sprinkled dried chicken dung on the loosened soil.She went to the stream beside the farm and dug a shallow canal to let the water flow across the farm.Sometimes she put both hands on my shoulders and said"Tin Win,youre a big boy .now papa is gone,you will be the man of the house." "Dont worry Mama, i can take care of you and San Kyi. i followed Mama to the farm when the sun was just coming up over the misty hills.There in between the rows of vegetables,i helped Mama to pluck off the snails,stomped on the shell till it went splat and cracked,the green n black entrails oozing out.When i spied the fat,juicy caterpillar munching on the leaves,i pinched them so hard that they burst into green globs sticking to the leaves Before 10 am,Mama put the vegetables in two big straw baskets and took the trishaw to town.Sometimes she killed a few chickens or sold the eggs. Mama made sure we had good meals when we were growing up. Mama told me "Its very dangerous for you to stay on here.I was now a tall 19 year old teenager and my sister was 23 years old. Ive saved up some money.Take it and follow our neighbour who is going to Bangkok next month.If the soldiers dont get you,the bombs will kill you one day. Mama is too old to run. So thats how we landed in Bangkok.My sis San Kyi got a job clipping the fingernails and toenails of customers while i worked as a waiter in a Thai cafe.We made sure we send back a few hundred baht each month to Mama so that she neednt work so hard . I liked chatting with the Thai chef and could pick out what he was saying.He liked me and sometimes asked me to pluck the vegetables or slice the meat.After a year or two,he taught me how to cook Thai dishes. With that skill,i got a job working as the chef of Rak Thai restaurant in Kuala Lumpur. Thats how i met Su Mon.Her dad was a lay pastor and his family had applied for refugee status with the UNHCR.They were waiting for asylum status in the US.Su Mon could read and speak in English and taught the kids at the refugee school during the weekends.There was a vacancy for a waitress in Rak Thai and i introduced her to work in the evening shift. She was a caring girl and would help me remit money back to my mama.She had an oval face and her eyes were very large with long lashes that curled upward.i could tell her everything including my dream of opening my own restaurant one day. After a year,we got married without her fathers blessing for he expected her as the eldest child to follow him to the US to help take care of her younger brothers. Working long hours in the hot kitchen is really tiring.I hardly had any energy left to take Su Mon shopping or catch a movie.I just felt like resting at home on my off days. Su Mon said one day "Dear,ive found a part time job at a handphone repair shop in the Skyla Mall.The pay is ok and can cover our food and utlity bills so you can send more money back home to your Mama and your sister who has to take care of your sick Mama and pay the hospital bills. I hugged her briefly and said" im the luckiest man here as my wife is so understanding." After three months,i noticed she had changed to an expensive I phone."Oh its nothing,my boss repaired an old phone that his friend didnt want and he gave it to me. i wanted her to quit her job but she was stubborn.I began following my fellow waiters to drink after work.The more I drank,the more cold Su mon became.Su Mon" im so sorry,I will stop drinking,i promise," I kept my word to save my marriage and she quitted her job to work in Rak Thai as a cashier.Pooling our savings,and together with four friends ,we rented a stall in a food court and sold Thai food.Business was brisk. After a year,our business got a small profit.I invested the money and pooled savings from our friends and we rented a shoplot,machinery for a central kitchen and supplied curry paste,tom yam and chilled desserts to the restaurants in the Klang valley. After nine years,We bought a condo and asked my mother and sister to come to stay with us.i believe that with hard work,its possible to start a new life.Whatever has happened is in the past.We only can move on to a new day,a new future.Despite the ups and downs in my life and the battles that never end ,my love for my family will never grow old.

Strive for realism

What values are promoted in Chinese movies? Romantic love and soppy sentimentality are the escapism theme as audiences seek fairy tale romances from childhood story of happily ever after.Now modern themes resonate with movie goers like struggle to find a partner due to career driven lifestyle or looks obsessed society leading to weight loss regimen or plastic surgery enhancement Then there are the rags to riches fairy tales of glotifying violence and triads of Hong Kong movies.For the heroine the dream partner is a rich ,powerful CEO with flaunting his supercars and branded items. So its refreshing that down to earth movies on death like the Last Dance or historical greviances like Snow in Midsummer or statelessness issue in Abang Adik is getting box office reception.So scriptwriters,get real and dont sell us dreams that are too good to be true

Another suicide

My heartfelt condolence to the family of the young man who jumped to his death from the same block of the condo complex im living in.I was having my breakfast at the ground floor cafe when the female cleaner came asking for someone to call the security manager.A young man looks like in his 20s lie sprawled on the groundfloor.Heard from a diner who lives on 5th floor ,he reported hearing loud quarrels and fights in the middle of the night.This morning,one occupant jumped down.It took more than half an hour for the police and ambulance to arrive.The security manager said there was a faint pulse in him when he first fell.The long wait could have resulted in a fatality. This is the second suicide this month. Im so saddened by the tragic events .today i will go to the temple to pray for the departed souls😥😢 what the heck this morning the breakfast gang updated us that the young man died in the ambulance on his way to the hospital because he broke his neck n spine.The rented apartment occupants were all young people from Myanmar hoping to make money to send home to families.i guess financial troubles cause emotions to run high until the fights got so bad that the young Myanmar worker leaped from the 5th floor.Eu Jun went to the Vihara to send some merits to the departed souls n pray they would finally rest in peace . A week of happy reunion and tragic departures.gives me an idea to write a story on the life of a migrant worker like how Malaysian auteur director Tsai Ming Liang made the movie of an indonesia migrant worker Sleepless in KL.So on those nites I lay awake,i take the chance to do creative writing.Ive written one on a nepalese security guard so maybe one of a myanmar restaurant cook. Mingalaba or May you be blessed They say its a blessing to be born into this human realm. So do I consider myself having a blessed life.My father worked hard planting rice,vegetables and rearing chickens and ducks on our small farm.I dont remember him much as when I was 5 years old,he went to the forest to clear the bushes,stepped on a landmine that took his life. My mother Aye worked on his fatm to support me and my elder sister.

Nostalgia

Zumba workout

i need to workout to burn the calories i overate at the buffet.

The peak of my career

Tonite im exhilarated beyond words.The ex students I taught early in my career are now in early fifties.100 of us reminiscing about the school days,singing the school song on a cold nite.They organised a high school reunion of friends meeting again after 35 years.im blessed to have such appreciative Malaysian students who still remember their old teachers in our twilight years and gave us a good buffet in a 5 star hotel.What touched me is their appreciation for what we did for them in their impressionable years and how we instill discipline and teamwork in them.Some travelled back from Singapore,UK n Australia to join this reunion. I laughed when they said i forced them to speak up in class especially those who hid their heads behind the text book.then i taught physical exercise and we recalled the social dances i taught and laughed at the colourful dance costumes they wore to perform. Malaysian students still have a lot of gratitude and we are blessed to guide them to be what they are today,caring,responsible and dedicated to excel.they gave us group photos and vintage note books with autograph n good wishes.Ii is really Malaysia kenangan manis

Leonard Cohen

San Francisco held a memorial concert to honour the Canadian poet Leonard Cohen.What a grand tribute for his insightful lyrics as he was also a prolific composer of songs and an ex Zen monk.What pain and wisdom he expresses is seen in his profuse outpouring of heart and soul.The poems sung a capella were so uplifting.

Writing poetry n painting

Art therapy relieves grief as does writing poems.They express pent up feelings so we avoid despair.Early dawn i painted a landscape of Mount Tambuyukon,Sabahs third highest mountain.I got lost in my painting until l didnt feel any hunger pangs.

Fireflies Are Just Fallen Stars! Do you know in the darkest depth of night The stars escape to earth Become fireflies flicker of hope dancing with soft,gentle grace bringing light down to earth

Mandala of happiness and peace

the park has fallen silent only a hundred birds singing on the trees There is only a solitary bench An empty space where you used to sit waiting for us to talk with you of happy times,good food and funny jokes Farewell,my friend Sorry we could not send you off on the last lap in this journey i made a floral memorial wreath for you of pink,feathery blooms and red berries Hope you will get our farewell gift A mandala of happiness and peace overlooking the view of the serene green lake By tomorrow the merciless sun would have withered the flowers The birds would have eaten all the berries Anicca and annata thats the cycle of life and death youve now taken a different route each of us will go off on our own path May we meet again one day in another world The empty seat is now occupied by an old man surfing on his phone. but the memory of you is deeply imprinted in all of our hearts.RIP .

Catty tail

Captain is an observant,curious.cat.

He has been observing me preparing meals and eating at the dining table.Now i cover all food at the table because the moment my back is turned,he jumps on the table to sniff the pesto bread or salami. I used the water gun to shoot him away as he hates to get wet But hes smart,the moment he sees me aiming the gun at him,he runs and hide inside his felt house. Now i buy cat repellent and sprinkle it at the buddha altar table.He hates the smell and doesnt go near it anymore.i buy him new toys that he destroys within a day.His new trick is to climb up the iron grille of the window until the top of the window so i keep windows closed at all times.next he jumps on the sofa beside fish tank n dips his paws inside to catch the small fishes swimming on the surface. last nite i enjoyed reading the children story book my younger brother wrote.When i read it to him as bedtime story,he gave a big yawn n fell asleep on the sofa. Im revamping my diet to cut off roast and smoked duck n shrimps which i suspect caused my finger joint inflammation.for lunch i ate the foccacia bread I baked with chicken pepperoni,tomato,pesto and lettuce.had a yoghurt with banana n blueberry n a glass of orange juice.for dessert i ate two rich walnut cookies.i blame the movie The Last Dance and Michael Huis food craving for walnut cookies.The traditional chinese food is the new dining trend now with kaya puff,walnut cookies and deep fried yam bean rolls.old is gold and nostalgic food sees a revival.now for my cantonese egg tart and wifes biscuit or lau po bang